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Sunday, April 18, 2010

Fifteen Things I Want to Do

Here's a list of 15 things I want to do. Not before I die... just do them whenever. These are completely unrelated to anything else I've got going on in my life. It's just long term "if I get to it" stuff. I saw another post that somebody did with the big stuff, I've decided to post this list to cover just the stuff that I want to do along the way. I've made lists like this in the past I think. I won't be reviewing them until after making this list and maybe comparing them at that point. This is purely spur of the moment.

Before I get to wordy, the list:

1. Live in/near a major city


2. Meet a world leader, past or present


3. Travel to all the continents


4. Play pachinko


5. Photograph my Life and the interesting stuff I see along the way


6. See the major Puroresu companies live (NOAH, NJPW, AJPW)


7. Get a dog


8. Learn to swim


9. Cook something from scratch and have it taste good


10. Drive a Delorean


11. Dress like Indiana Jones


12. Attend the World Cup


13. Cross country road trip


14. Trek through a jungle


15. Capture and convey what that insanity in my mind, the feelings and images, create, never let go of the spirit of imagination


Okay I let one big picture thing sneak in at the end. The rest of it is just stuff. That last thing is my partly my creed and partly my ultimate goal.
I can achieve most of this stuff for sure, they just aren't priorities. I'll slot them in when the time is right. If I don't accomplish these? No big loss. I can live without doing them but if I manage to do 2/3 of this list I'll be able to proudly hold up my head and say I've lived.

I had to work hard to ensure this just didn't become a list of places I'd like to go, so I lumped travel together in number three. Specific types of travel (road trip, jungle trek) were unique enough to warrant their own spots.

It's a decent list. I challenge y'all to come up with your own. Small stuff, not the big "bucket list" stuff.

Friday, April 16, 2010

Games Meant for Greatness

Continuing my current trend of posting long diatribes about video games I bring to you a list of games that I got extremely hyped up about and ended up barely touching. I guess it will also include games that I got excited for but ended up hating or feeling, perhaps undeservedly, disappointed with the finished product. I know... another list. Bear with me for the moment because I'm experiencing a resurgence of writing and this is part of the process. This is a topic that I've seen a fair bit of discussion about in recent times, notably from an interview with Sid Meier.

To be fair a lot of the blame for this phenomenon has to be put on my shoulders, as they should be for any gamer. When I anticipate a game I start building it up to great proportions in my mind. I take any tidbit of information and wildly imagine the most creative interpretation of that data possible. Sometimes that's aided by the type of interview given by the developers (see Peter fucking Molyneux as a perfect example). I suppose leaving some topics purposefully ambiguous before the release cuts down on this somewhat, I still manage to put these games on a pedestal. As Sid Meier said in an interview, we are already playing these games in our head before we ever play them on a screen. Sometimes there are unrealistic expectations by myself and other gamers put onto big name games.

Coming from the other side now we have failing to live up to promises. While we as gamers aren't entitled to make demands on those who make games we have the right to expect a quality product. Don't we? If a game company is listing features and making promises on gameplay then we have a reasonable to expect them to deliver. If they don't we're going to call them on it. You can't slip crap through the cracks anymore. Simply spitting in the gamers faces after the release of a game and saying "Didn't have time" or "That was just an early build" is a douchebag move. The big companies aren't guilty of this very often. It's usually the small indy company or the 'name' developer (like Molyneux) that are guilty of false hype. There are a plethora of reasons, certainly, but what it comes down to is don't make promises you don't intend to keep.

Well that's enough with the rant. There's more I could say and a lot more avenues to be explored. I definitely didn't flesh out my arguments. Well maybe that's for another time. On to the list!

FABLE
Let's start with the big boy over hype, Fable. There was so much promised in this game that it would have been impossible for them to even deliver half of it at the time. Technically the stuff they were talking about weren't even feasible. Hell most of the stuff they promised then couldn't be (or has yet to be) achieved by now. The basic idea was that this was going to be a world that was alive and that could be changed by the player. Some of the grand ideas were making decisions that had lasting impact on the world, starting trends in fashion and style, placing something that would change the world around it as time passed, and living the entire life of the main character as the world grows with you. In the end none of this was possible. Your impact on the world was nonexistent. The only "change" you could make was moving your morality up and down a slider. Like we haven't seen that done before, and better. The world was static and didn't change at all. True your character grows and ages, but everything else stays the same. It just felt very uninspired truthfully. Almost every one of the grand promises wasn't present. This isn't to say that Fable was a bad game, it just wasn't what everybody thought it would be based on what were told constantly for three years. Huge, huge, disappointment. Fable II made more big promises, which were undelivered. By that time we'd all learned not to listen to Molyneux.

WWF Attitude
This was really just stupidity of youth. I was a big, big wrestling fan back in 1998. The 'current' game available was WWF Warzone, which was awful and featured wrestlers that had mostly left the company. So when I heard that a new game was coming out I did what any teenage idiot would do, hype the game to unimaginable levels in my head. I imagined what I would be able to do, how I would create dozens of wrestlers in the CAW mode, and the titles I would win with such 'legends' as Gangrel, Brian Christopher, and Thrasher. This was, when it finally came out in 1999, such an uninspired piece of garbage that I barely ended up playing it very much. It utilized a terrible fighting game control scheme in which you had to press button combos to perform moves. It was bad. This was the first in a long line of wrestling game disappointments. Considering that WWF Wrestlemania 2000 and WWF No Mercy came out in the following years, this piece of junk fades into the mists of history as a forgotten relic of wrestling's past. The stigma of this engine wouldn't disappear, however, as ECW put out two games with this exact same play style. To say they were received poorly is an understatement.

SPORE
Here we go again... it's almost like relieving the Fable release. Spore was a game that was long in development and we were introduced to it during a very early stage. This meant we had years to hear about it and listen to the little lies that were being fed to us. Spore was supposed to be the grandest scale game of all time. The game would follow a species from life as a single-celled organism all the way to space faring explorers and everything in between. Extensive creation tools were supposed to give us the ability to craft their culture and look to the most minute details. After years of development it was time for it to be released. Millions were clearly spent on advertising. It was everywhere, it was in the public eye. DRM issues aside, the game delivered... on the creation tools. The rest of the game... meh. It was very, very disheartening to learn that the actual gameplay of the game was meant specifically for casuals. Even less than casuals, non-gamers really. The creation tools were so deep that entire styles of architecture could be created and thousands of unique species of creatures could be created. I personally created more than a hundred creatures. While it was a bit exciting to see your creations show up randomly in the game... there wasn't much else to do with them. The world simply felt lazy. There was no real depth to the gameplay, each stage could be finished in under an hour. The only stage that really interested me was the second stage where you actually walk around, third person, as one of your creatures. Aside from this we get dumbed down 'tribe', 'civilization', and 'space' stages. Gamers like depth. An emotional connection draws people into putting many, many hours into a game. You couldn't have that connection with your Spore creatures since there was no depth. Spore is a mixed bag, excellent creation tools with limited game experience.

Unlimited SaGa
Don't mess with what a series is at it's core, people. I would have defended the SaGa series against anybody's insults should the need have arisen. While most people passed over SaGa Frontier's 1 & 2, I played and loved both of them. Romancing SaGa 3 was one of the best games never to get localized (officially). Then I heard a new game was coming out on the PS2 and allowed myself to get excited. What I ended up with was a game that was beyond shitty. For a series that isn't well known to try something so disastrous is foolish, and this game killed the series. Sure they remade Romancing SaGa 1, but in the end we all know there won't be any future SaGa games. Unlimited went so far away from what the series was that it took my interest and smashed it with a hammer. I can still go back and enjoy the older games, but I have little hope for the future.

While researching this article I came across a few games that often appeared on lists of games that failed to live up to the hype. While common amongst those that made the lists, I never got caught up in their hype machines enough to get disappointed. Here's a few of the games that commonly made pundits "Most Disappointing" lists that aren't on mine, and why.

Enter the Matrix - Never got into this game. While I was interested in everything that had to do with The Matrix I wasn't looking forward to this game. What little I played it wasn't terrible, so it's not on my list.

Daikatana - I understand why this game is on other lists. I think others have done a good job outlining the situation surrounding Daikatana. I never even heard of this game until a couple of years ago, so that's why it's not on my lists.

Too Human - Didn't follow the development cycle, didn't care too much for it. I own it and find it decent enough.

S'all.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Faraday

Halfway through the month and I only have four (well five now) posts. It's been my slowest month here by a longshot! I do apologize, since I really haven't been busy. The only thing I've been doing is injecting large doses of pop culture and internets. Pondering my future as well, I suppose. I spend a lot of time thinking about how to get where I want to go and how to achieve my dreams. The worst thing about me is that I'm not a very resourceful guy so it makes any task daunting.

I've decided I'm definitely getting a netbook when I get my return back. A relatively cheap Asus from Best Buy is what I'm currently considering. Since it was suggested that they'll perform browsing and word processing adequately I was sold. That's really all I need my portable platform to do. I need it to be more of a tool than entertainment, though I imagine it'll handle stuff like Hulu just fine. Thanks for the input guys.

The job search is the most frustrating thing in my life right now. I have an interview with Pepsi later today for a menial labor job. I think there's a decent chance that I can land this job. That is to say I hope there is a decent chance. I can barely describe the trouble looking for a legit job in this area has caused for me. Experience is the name of the game, and it's something I simply don't have enough of for a 'good' job. So I'm just going to hold out for a shitty job. They suck, they take your soul and your spirit, but they pay. College really doesn't prepare you for life and thanks to my lackadaisical upbringing I'm just not able to make my way in this world. Cross your fingers that I find my ambition... or motivation rather. I don't lack for ambition. I aspire to be any number of things and to get to all these amazing places. I just don't know how to get there. Sitting on my ass won't do the job. What will? I really wish I was more resourceful.

When I first lost my job I was actually a bit excited to be honest. I thought "Finally I'm out of that stagnant environment. Finally I can flex my creative muscle and find something more worthy of my talents!" I really thought I would be able to make the most of my time. For a while I think I did. Once the initial glumness of losing my job wore off, I really started to fire on all cylinders. I got motivated and discovered a hundred little things in the world to make my life more full. Even if it was something as simple as following a vlogger on Youtube there was so much to do and see. I had time for my projects, for my hobbies, for my life again. I was working on stuff every day. Over time I noticed that this gradually wore off, and now four months later I'm sort of desperate to get a job again since I wasn't able to turn anything I did into money. Or finish anything I started. I may have started 10 projects a week, but I didn't finish a single one. Depressing, no? I think if I had somebody to work with it might motivate me again. Collaborative efforts are the best way to go if you have trouble motivating yourself I've heard. I've lost that initial buoyant spirit I had back in January and February. I'm desperate for a job and now realize that I'll have to compromise for a long time to come.

Enough whining! That's my situation in life up there, my true dilemma. My continuing quarter-life crisis. I exited college into a world that didn't have any demand for my skills. And since I didn't have the knowledge of where to put my skills to use, I floundered and picked up a job that I coasted at for two years. Despite numerous chances for advancement I resisted since I had no desire to move upwards at that company. I was always holding out for Ashes' graduation and my chance to finally move over seas and live my dream in an Asian land. South Korea. Japan originally, but the demand for teachers there just isn't what it used to be in the early 2000s. My dream is seeming to pass me by now as I find myself horribly unqualified for the job, which I was always told was fine. Now I'm not so sure. I had a phone interview with a recruiter that seemed excited about Ashes (she's a teacher and all) but really made it seem like I was doomed. That damn near broke my heart and soul. I say damn near because we aren't out of the running for these jobs. Fingers crossed again for this one.

So now I realize that if you want a break in life you have to make it yourself. You have to make your own chances and your own luck. This is why I'm writing much more often (not necessarily all at this blog either). I will make my name in this world yet. I will prove my worth, make my name and get to a place where I'm content with what I do. I want to create. The motivation has to match the ambition. That point is coming.

Purple monkey dishwasher.

Monday, April 12, 2010

Winding Down the Season Pt. 2: Champions and Europas

With the domestic seasons nearing the end that means that the continental competitions are also heading towards their exciting conclusions. While the domestic leagues (the big 5 in particular) are the meat of soccer, the continental competitions are the whipped cream and peanut butter on top of that meat. Doesn't make sense you say? Well fuck you. If you aren't eating your meat with peanut butter and fucking whipped cream then you're a nazi.

Anyway, the continental competitions are the proving grounds for the best teams. The UEFA Champions League is the best of the best. The winners and high ranking teams are all in this competition, which means the best dream matchups happen here. Man United, Chelsea, Inter, AC Milan, Real Madrid, Barcelona, Bayern Munich, Olympique Lyonnais, Liverpool, Arsenal, and Bordeaux are just some of the teams that make regular appearances. It's like the Super Bowl of soccer. The World Cup may be the premier event in soccer, but the Champions League happens every year and basically crowns the world's best team. It starts off in round robin groups but the real excitement is in the knockout rounds. It's pure nerves when you're playing for everything, pride and glory for your nation and league. It's a proving ground for the leagues to battle out for superiority. It's the best yearly competition in the world. Period.

The other European continental competition is the Europa League. This was previously known as the UEFA Cup tournament up until last year. A new structure and an image makeover went into effect this year in an effort to boost the level of this event. It's worked, let me tell you, and in it's inaugural season the Europa League has been more exciting than the Champions League. A bit of an explanation first. This is the second level of European club competitions, featuring domestic cup winners and usually 3rd-7th place teams. The kicker is that teams finishing third in the group stages of the Champions League participate in the Europa League knockout rounds. It's all a bit complicated the way everything intertwines and qualification works. This means that the if the big teams fumble early in the Champions League they can make up for it in the Europa League.

With the explanations out of the way let's take a closer look at the current situations of both these competitions.

UEFA CHAMPIONS LEAGUE 2009-2010

The contenders that are still remaining are defending champions Barcelona, Italian champions Inter Milan, French powerhouse Olympique Lyonnais, and German leaders Bayern Munich. This is an extremely strong field and honestly I don't care which team takes it all. I think that Barcelona have the edge since they almost certainly the best team in the world right now. Inter Milan would be the team I'd be most excited about winning it, but I wouldn't begrudge Munich or Lyon. German and France aren't often in contention at this late stage of the tournament. It's exciting stuff since all four of these teams are having great seasons in their domestic leagues. No English teams in the semis for the first time in five or six years does disappoint me, however. Inter takes on Barca and Lyon faces Bayern in the semis. My prediction for the final is Barcelona vs Bayern, with Barca repeating as champions.

UEFA EUROPA LEAGUE 2009-2010

While the Champions League is having a straightforward season the Europa League is having an amazing first run. The contenders at this point are my favorites Liverpool, Spanish side Atletico Madrid, German contenders Hamburger SV, and the Cinderalla story team Fulham. I'm pulling for Liverpool, obviously, but I'm dreaming of the all-England final of Liverpool vs Fulham. Atletico are no pushovers and had to down countrymen Valencia and defending runners-up Werder Bremen to get this far.
Liverpool has come from a losing leg in the last two rounds to move on each time. It may be one of the worst seasons in years for the Reds, but if they can salvage this tourney it's not a complete throwaway.
Fulham is having the greatest success of their entire history by beating defending UEFA Cup champs Shakhtar Donetsk (Ukrainian), German champs Wolfsburg, and ultra-powerhouse Juventus. Their 4-1 win over Juventus was Fulham's absolute greatest moment ever. I'm partial to Fulham since the USA's best player, Clint Dempsey, plays for the side. I think they'll make the final out of sheer will.
The last semifinalist is Hamburger SV. The final of this tournament takes place in Hamburg, so the team will be that much more motivated to put one over on Fulham. It'll be a hell of a fight and I highly suggest you try and catch Fulham vs Hamburg somehwere.
Sadly the Europa League isn't being played on any American stations that I can find. The final will be shown on ESPN2 like last year I'm guessing. It'll be an exciting match whichever teams are in it (PLEASE LET IT BE LIVERPOOL!).

So there is the news from the continent. Only a few weeks left until the climax of the season. Fingers crossed that we get some really good matches and really interesting results. Next time I'll talk about the upcoming World Cup. Yeah, it's time to get excited bitches.

Saturday, April 10, 2010

Winding Down the Season Pt. 1: League Play

The 2009-2010 season is drawing to a close in all of Europe's top soccer leagues. It's getting to be pretty close in some leagues which is sure to lead to some really nice stretches as we head into the final games. It's actually getting pretty exciting because there are no sure fire champions pulling away in many of the big leagues. It's rare to see in a sport that is usually typified by one dominant force.

In particular the Premier League is a close three way dance between Arsenal, Chelsea, and Manchester United. Liverpool are, sadly, only fighting for 4th and a Champions League appearance next season. I expected a lot more out of Liverpool this season but a few preseason players leaving seemingly dealt a major hit to the team which has been sitting in the upper midtable for most of the season. They are, however, still in the running for the Europa League which I will discuss below. At the top I'm really hoping for Man Utd to stumble here at the end of the season as are many. Chelsea are ahead by two as I write this, Man Utd is in second and Arsenal are a point behind them. I really would love to see Arsenal string together a run of wins and overtake the other two. I suspect it will be Chelsea in the end. Liverpool are likely not to end up in fourth. Tottenham are looking strong and I'd say they'll take fourth with Man City in fifth.

Spain's La Liga is down to two, the only two really. Real Madrid and Barcelona are duking it out on equal points, with Valencia in third an without hope to bridge the gap. So it comes down to a race between two teams that are so damn rich that if they aren't fighting for first it's a shame on them. Especially Real. They went Yankees before the season, buying the likes of Cristiano Ronaldo, Karim Benzema and Kaka. Still they're barely ahead of Barcelona, mostly due to the sheer brilliance of the best player in the world, Lionel Messi. Go Barcelona I say, trounce those bastards.

Probably the most exciting league to be watching right now is the Italian Serie A. Inter Milan have led for most of the season and are looking like a strong contender to win their 5th straight Scudetto. However AC Milan and Roma aren't letting them get it easy. The race for the Serie A title is as close as it has ever been, which is producing some wonderful games. Palermo, the pink wonders from Sicily, are sitting in 4th and have a chance to go to the Champions League next season. To everyone's delight Juventus is completely bumbling, somewhere in 7th or so. The team that was forcibly relegated for cheating several seasons ago is languishing in failure. Having hilariously lost to Fulham in the Europa League, Juventus' glory days are long gone. My money is on Inter to win it, but they have more chances to get fatigued as they are still in the running for the Champions League.

French Ligue 1 Orange has a five way race for the title. Marseille, Olympique Lyonnais, Montpellier, Auxerre and Bordeaux are all within 3 points of each other. I'm not even sure who I think will win this league since I don't follow it too closely. To have so many teams in contention either shows the strength of those teams or the weakness of the league as a whole. With Lyon in the semis of the Champions League it's probably the latter. I'd like to see Auxerre take it I think. Anyone but Lyon.

Germany, Portugal, Greece, Ukraine, and Holland are all having some rather uninspiring seasons. Bayern is in the lead in the Bundesliga, with Schalke chasing. No Hoffenheim to present an exciting challenge, no underdog Wolfsburg chasing their first glory. Just Bayern at the top. How boring. Portugal is being contested by the same three teams. Braga is making a run at Benfica, which is great, but they won't win it. Braga isn't Sporting, Porto or Benfica so it can't win. The Portuguese league is probably the most boring of the 'major' European leagues. Greece I only mention because Olympiakos is in first, like always. Aris, the team that Freddy Adu sometimes plays for, is way out of contention. Greece sucks. Ukraine is a two horse race between Shakhtar and Dinamo Kiev. How will it turn out? Shakhtar I hope, but really couldn't care less. FC Twente is in the lead in Netherlends, which is pretty cool since they aren't PSV or Ajax. Last season's winner AZ is out of reach, and my favorite Feyenoord is barely ahead of them. I hope Twente takes it because I like seeing 'Yankees'-type teams like Ajax and PSV lose. I wish Feyenoord could get their shit together and win the league someday.

Finally I'll mention the Turkish league. This league has only ever been won by four teams: Fenerbache, Besiktas, Trabzonspor, and Galatasaray. These are all pretty interesting teams, but to have a league only have four champions in over 50 years is ridiculous. Imagine how boring American sports would be if only four teams won in that long. The sport would die. This season, however, there is another team on top of the table and is putting up a fight for their first ever title. Unheralded Bursaspor are taking second place Fenerbahce to the wire with a close race. Now I do love Fenerbahce, but I'm really rooting for Bursaspor to win in this one. I encourage you to as well.

Scotland isn't even worth a mention. There are only two teams in Scotland, and until something drastic happens... what's the point?

Next time I'll talk about the European club competitions and the semifinalists in each of those. Champions League. Europa League. Next time!

Monday, April 5, 2010

Another Nothing

I founded a page over on Tumblr to go along with this one here. I would say hand in hand but the two aren't related in the least.
Here I try to post some semi coherent posts about a (small) variety of subjects. I attempt to remain somewhat scholarly even though by all accounts I fail spectacularly.

Over there it's an extension of my bumblings around the internet on any given day. So far it's just pictures that strike my fancy. Soon it will be the most interesting bits and bobs that I like and find. So check it out. Or don't. I don't really give a fuck.

It's Adventures of Silas... a name with little in common with what is posted beneath it. I did/do plan to write some children's stories detailing the 'adventures' of my pet cat, or rather the personality which has been projected onto him. I think it would be quite a fun project. Y'know because I'm so good at getting those going.

I can't wait to have a laptop. I think. Are netbooks any good?

Friday, April 2, 2010

Vomit Out My Brain

I don't know if the little dialogues in my head are the mark of a good writer or the mark of a true schizophrenic. Hmmm, food for thought.

Youtube has really been lame lately. During the first month of my unfortunate unemployment it was vital to keeping my sanity and driving that "I'm totally going to make the most of this abundant time!" attitude. Now all the good vloggers have gone quiet and the midcard has been pure bunk. Vimeo is pretty damn cool though. Much more documentary style stuff, less focus on the horrifying crap that fills out Youtube.

I've been holding out for a cheap intervalometer. I'm not holding my breath for now since I don't have any extra income. I really want to start learning the art of the timelapse. Especially if (and it seems like a real IF) I end up going to South Korea. I caught some truly inspired time lapses over on Vimeo.

I have about 3 half finished posts written up in my queue for this blog. Full length opinion article type stuff. Mostly its about video games, but you write what you know and can get fired up about. I just don't have the motivation to get all the way through writing them. That has been my primary problem for years. I have a shitty work ethic when it comes to sitting down and putting my thoughts into words. Unlike on a job where I'm totally devoted to succeeding. You wouldn't even recognize me at work and at home. I'm get fired up and get the job done. I was in a whole different world when I worked at that warehouse last summer. All of my managers constantly recognized my work ethic, which led to some decent raises and promotions. Until I got laid off. Thanks for all the hard work and consistently being the best in the department! Now get the fuck out. You wonder why I have trouble getting motivated?!?! There's no reward in my world for motivation.

Final Fantasy XIII still sucks. Even the Japanese think so I've heard. Didn't stop it from becoming the biggest success in franchise history. That makes me think this format will be embraced and we'll never see a good Final Fantasy again. XII really was good, it just took me a while to realize. X was an absolute triumph, even if it was linear it was balanced. Poor one on the curb for my dead homie, the FF series. Hell might as well poor one out for the JRPG in general.

I've come up with some pretty good ideas lately. It's all genre fiction. Fantasy, sci fi, time travel, post apocalyptic, etc. A few stories about quarterlife which I actually quite like. You write what you know.

My cat Silas had to have surgery again. Second time in three years. Already paid $300 and will have to pay at least another $2o0. Y'know what though? I don't even care. I never really bonded with an animal before so I didn't know why people would be willing to cough up the money for a surgery like this one. I had a shitty pet when I was younger, Caesar. He's the most hateful animal in the world and I couldn't give half a shit about him. I'll just shrug my shoulders when he (finally) dies. Silas is mine though. He's friendly and likes me which makes him worth the money. You can't understand the human-pet bond until you have a pet that it actually happens with. I'm sure Ashes would agree that he's worth the money too.

Biking is fun and heathy, when I can get off my ass and do it. Been pretty diligent about it lately. Now that the weather is nicer I expect to be outside even more. I expect to do a lot of biking and hiking this summer since we really don't have the money for bigger trips.

I'm writing this on Ashes' MacBook and I really like the sound that my typing makes. It's much more satisfying than the click-click-click of a regular keyboard. It's more of a thunk-thunk-thunk type of sound. I'm planning on getting a laptop before going overseas. Mine won't be as good as this one, since I don't have the money or desire to own a Mac, but it'll be better than my shitbox of a desktop computer. I think I'll only be able to afford a netbook, though, so it won't be as fun to type on as this Mac. Portable though so I'm not constrained to a dusky corner of our living room.

That's all.

Globally Ignored